Fact Or Fiction?
Good Morning neighbors, I hope I find you well today. Last time we visited about who we are, how different we are, and our need to be united. I truly hope that every one of you realizes the unique individual you are, and that we can appreciate our neighbors for the ones they are. What I find simply ridiculous is what those in power, media and the extreme left and right believe we are. So, my question today is; Is what you hear daily about who and what you and your neighbors are fact or fiction?
How have we allowed the stereotypes to define us? Every time I hear one of the tired old tropes, and some of the new ones, from both sides I simply shake my head. Am I so invisible that those who don’t believe, think, or live the same way I do think that a few words describe my beliefs and values? As a white middle age, heterosexual, libcon (liberal conservative, yes I labeled myself). I am called a racist, homophobe, election denier, gun lover, misogynist, oppressor, bigot, xenophobic, climate denier, corporate shill, and fascist among others.
So according to the mainstream media and the progressive left I personally hate all different colored people and other nationalities. They tell me and everyone else that I believe women should “know their place” and that I actively want to tell them what to do with their body. They say that I am a gun lover first and foremost over a safe society. They assert directly that the main thing I judge you on is your race, ethnicity, gender, political affiliation, or religion. They tell anyone that will listen that I love corporations and deny science specifically as put forth in climate discourse or public health. They espouse that I believe an election was stolen, I support the January 6 assault (yeas it was an assault) on our capital, and that our country is best represented by an authoritarian ruler. They try to convince themselves and others that I simply want a white, male dominated, corporate led authoritarian government that allows any gun anytime and absolutely no abortion under any pretense.
Hmm quite frankly I honestly don’t know one single person that fits that description. Do you? That’s not my neighbors.
How about what the ultra-conservatives say about the left? If you are a liberal you are Marxist, baby killers, open border supporter, feminazis, woke, secularist, police abolitionist, globalist, terrorist and a socialist. We are being told that you want to abolish our public safety experts, that you believe anyone and everyone should be allowed to enter the US unchallenged. You are for all abortions anytime and on the government or corporate dime. They believe you want to confiscate all guns from private citizens. They will try to convince others that you support all terrorists and radical feminine or gender issues. You believe that government should simply play the role of Robin Hood and take from the rich to give to the poor. Simply put they try to convince themselves and others in this country that you want would provide an abortion on demand, have genderless society, corporations that bow to government demands, unchallenged immigration, a gunless citizenry, and a government that is full of freebies for the people.
Again hmm. Does that accurately describe you or any of your neighbors? So, let’s take a few of these issues and see if we can separate fact from fiction. Once again neighbors the important thing here is what do WE believe as the middle. Some of these labels may truly describe you or some of your friends and neighbors, but I hazard a guess that not every one of them does.
It should be natural to have a discussion of fact or fiction about what is believed or said about us. But somehow its become verboten. This was emphasized by a recent article I read from Nicole Russell, a USA Today columnist. This article is an opinion piece titled “I’m a Republican woman. Progressives are wrong about what I believe.” Sometimes it’s easy to believe that we are alone and that we are traveling a lonely road with few fellow travelers. But her op-ed reminded me why I’m doing this. I will openly admit it is difficult representing those it appears I have little in common with. Especially when all I hear is that your different from me and vice versa. But that’s simply an appearance not reality.
In her article, Nicole specifically references a story on the cover of New York magazine. In this article the author writes openly about how they don’t understand republican women. To make their point the author uses Rep. Nancy Mace, Rep. Marjorie Taylor-Greene, Rep. Lauren Boebert, and South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem. The articles author states “women fundamentally cannot lead a party that wants to oppress women, they cannot, in fact, even be fully human within it.” Nicole asks this question “Am I really less than fully human because I share the same conservative beliefs as millions of other Americans?” Are you not fully human because you believe differently from the extremists (whom the New York magazine article uses as examples) in the other party or even your own? How about your neighbors, are they fully less human because of their beliefs, values, and morals? The answer is Hell No we are not.
So, if all we hear about is the lack of humanity in the other side what are we to do? The extremes want to “discredit, demonize, and bludgeon as deviants rather than respect as human beings” (Russell) and neighbors. What are we to do? If our divisions are simply the result of misunderstandings and unfamiliarity, what are we to do? What we do neighbor, is talk to each other.
In the not-so-distant past, American neighborhoods were represented by the front porch. Children played outside in the neighborhood with a “be home before the street lights come on” curfew. Why so late? Because the neighbors were looking out from their front porch. Neighbors had evening walkers sit on their porch, drink a cold iced tea or lemonade and talk. They talked about today. They talked honestly and openly because of the comfort of the front porch and the comfort knowing their neighbor was in it with them. We’ve lost the easiness of conversation and familiarization of the front porch. I realize this seems like a distant memory and for many of you a time that never existed. But it can exist today if we only open up to our neighbors, understand, and begin to trust them.
How as neighbors do we create the 21st century version of the front porch? The front porch never suffered from the anonymous danger. You didn’t worry about a drive by insult from some stranger in a car. But today it’s easy to hide behind our anonymity and keep our distance, because our front porch has become social media, and anonymous relationships(if they can even be termed a relationship). It’s simply too easy to be nasty and dismissive when we can hide behind that anonymity, and our neighborhoods are suffering. My neighborhood in the 80”s had zero back yard fences. We made the back yards our playground (except old Mr Thompson). Then one neighbor got a fence because they needed one with a pool. Another neighbor got one for a dog and another neighbor because he only had to pay for 1|3 of a fence because his other two neighbors built theirs first. So pretty soon there were very few yards without a fence, which seems to be an apt description of today.
As a society we have put up our fences, abandoned the front porch, and retreated to our backyards and living rooms. No longer the bastion of civil discourse or neighborly interaction, our front porches have become the place for flower displays, the Christmas wreath, maybe a doormat that says “Welcome”. Its become the place we hang a flag or banner or sign that signifies I’m different than you please stay away. Are most of these put up in solidarity with a cause or simply because we want to make a statement? Our “Welcome” mats never felt so hollow and insincere.
So where do you fall in this? Do you believe the fact or fiction about your neighbor? Ever sat outside in your front yard and involved yourself in the neighborhood around you? Or are you simply giving lip service to your “Welcome” mat? Are you more interested in whether the Amazon driver delivers today or that you catch your neighbor outside? Have you chosen anonymity and fences over engagement and understanding? All of us are guilty, partly because we are busy, but mostly because we simply quit caring. We quit caring because we are told constantly by our representatives, media, and social media anonymity, that the other side is dangerous. It’s time we all started caring about our neighbors again. Let’s “Welcome” them to our front porches and therefore into our lives. Remember you are not alone!!
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